I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
if i can run in heels then i can drive
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize