I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
