I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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