they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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