Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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