Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize