The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
As shirtless as possible
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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