he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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