you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
She even gives head with a lisp.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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