O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
