it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
