Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
should my penis look like a turkey
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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