i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i will never coherently bang her
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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