did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
