he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
