Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
