I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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