i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I have grass duct taped all over my body
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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