brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize