He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
