it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
