She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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