You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
zippers are such a cool invention
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
