i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
