He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize