...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize