they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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