He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Be still, my beating vagina.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
