we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize