Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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