Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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