This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
