if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
i now understand why vodka
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
