i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
