I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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