apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
