I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
My bed smells like the plague
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
