so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize