i permit you to call me
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize