I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
