She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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