he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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