I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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