there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize