You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
