can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm always down for nudity.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
