im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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