Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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