She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
