I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
