Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
