I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
